my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
