I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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