never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
