I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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