I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Can I color on your dick again?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
