i think i have herpe
just one?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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