I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Randomize
