its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
