I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
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I just googled if crying burns calories
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
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Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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