he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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