left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize