My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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