Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
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