Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize