Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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