i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
