Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
only you would photoshop your dick
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
