Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize