I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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