Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
its not stalking. its research.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
