Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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