ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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