Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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