There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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