I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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