we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
