Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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