forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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