Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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