I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize