Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
