people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
