ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
