I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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