Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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