How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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