OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Enjoy the penises
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
