At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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