We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
