Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
