Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
