mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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