I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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