By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize