the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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