so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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