I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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