that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
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Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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