He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
