if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
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