Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
